What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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