SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

my wife out of the kitchen

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Adam Fantuzzi loves stroking jacobs small penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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