What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Chuck Norris.

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

kennah campion when she talks

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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