How many 3 legged black Irish catholic obstetricians, walking into a bar, does it take to make a chicken cross the road? Fish!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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How many athiests does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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