A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock.. Who's there? Not Sally!

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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