What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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