What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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haha

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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