What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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