An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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Two friends were hanging out. One of them asks, "what's that awful smell?" the other replies, "I AM NOT A ROBOT!"

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

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why do the jewish guy and italian girl talk? i dont know why any decent minded italian would talk to a jew so i don't know.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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yo mama so ugly she made a happy meal frown.

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How do you drown a fish? You don't...

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops