What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? None, there is nothing wrong with the light bulb.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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