What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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