Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Hey, dude, wanna hear a joke? Sure... Pussy. ...I dont get it... Exactly! HAHAHAHAHAHA

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Obama holds the most records for Multikills with Drones. Mu-mu-muuuultiiikilllll.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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