Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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He--Hey guys

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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why are balck people black because they are

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

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Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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