Ask me if I care. Do you care? No.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

Roses are red, yup.

Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...