Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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knock knock who's there? faith

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops