Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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John: Hey Debbie, do you wanna go see a movie with me? Dina: My name is Dina

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360 NO SCOPE

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Yo mama so fat she has to wear large clothes

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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