A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

thumb_up thumb_down -48

what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

thumb_up thumb_down -54

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -54

What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

You know what's funny? You got AIDs

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops