Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

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Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

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Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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What's black and yellow and flies? I dont know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops