Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

What do black people and asians have in common? arms

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

White men's rights

What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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MOAR??

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