John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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