Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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Pain Olympics.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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42

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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