I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Faithful men.

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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