how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Justin Bieber

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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