a man walks into a bar. he gets a beer and talks to his friends. he then goes home.

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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