How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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Here's a joke The Holocaust.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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