How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

What's red and checkered and tells you to turn your music down? Michael

What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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