a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

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lol

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

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Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

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Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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