Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Q. What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? A. I don't were cleats when I jump on my trampoline.

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My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? A: Get in the car.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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