A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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