What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

9

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

A Christian walks into a bar . . . mitzvah.

why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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