Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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