Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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12 niqqa 12.

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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