Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

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When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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