What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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school homewrok

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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