roses are red turtles are random. cancer

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How to have a cheap party in just 5 steps: 1. Buy 100 McDonald's burgers and give everyone food poisoning 2. Bring out that black serial killer's mask you've been working on. 3. Bring out that sharp knife. 4. Slit everyone's throats. 5. Dance.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

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why was the clown sad? died of cancer and left his loving family to fend for themselves in this cruel, cruel world.

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Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

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What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

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What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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