Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

69

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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