What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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TRICERATOPS!

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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