A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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