How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

Should a pole bump an alarm?

A black man provides has a normal day job and provides for his family while staying faithful to his wife.

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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