What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops