What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies. I'd rather had the porsche in my garage

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

your mama's so fat... that's it

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...