How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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sucks Syntax...

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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Sex

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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* anti-punchline

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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