How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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