what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A panda , a cheetah, a dog, a spider, and an eagle are in Antarctica.. The eagle looks around at the other baffled animals and says " What is this????? This isn't right! I'm so confused!"

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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This is an anti- joke

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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96

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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