roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

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If life gives you lemonade.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops