What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. It's an average bar. However these men don't drink. The priest ordered some onion rings, the minister fries and the rabbi poutine. They're good friends despite their different religious views.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops