If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

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What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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I'm Coming

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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Women's rights

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops