How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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Ehh

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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