What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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Why? Why not?

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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