Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

My jeans

What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

A man died.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

How did the black person die? Of old age

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

Sarah Palin's political campaign

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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