What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

Josh Brown loved coressing his mums doodle at night.

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

Dwight Howard

Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck a poetry now show me your tits!!!

Q: What happens when two feminists try to chanbe a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

why did you poop because you are a poop

Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...