A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

I have a horse.

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

What stops a train? A missile

What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

guess what? bannanas

What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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