Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

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Why did the hispanic buy a pepsi? Because he was thirsty.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

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What is the difference between and Jew and a Boy Scout? The Boy Scout comes back from camp.

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What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops