A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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it was all Tagart

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

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What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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